“Stop Checking Your Likes” by Susie Moore Reveals the Secrets to Transforms Your Mindset

Shake Off the Need for Approval and Live an Incredible Life. In the groundbreaking book “Stop Checking Your Likes,” renowned author Susie Moore offers a powerful and transformative approach to achieving success and fulfillment in life.

This enlightening guide challenges readers to break free from the chains of social media validation and embrace their true potential. Prepare to embark on a journey of self-discovery and personal growth as Moore unveils the secrets to unlocking your inner strength and creating a life of purpose and passion.

Discover the life-changing insights that await you in “Stop Checking Your Likes.” Dive into the pages of this must-read book and unlock the tools you need to transform your mindset, overcome obstacles, and achieve your wildest dreams. Don’t miss out on this opportunity to revolutionize your approach to success and happiness.

Genres

Communication Skills, Motivation, Inspiration, Personal Development, Self-help, Motivational, Inspirational, Psychology, Social media, Technology, Business, Self-improvement, Mindfulness

In “Stop Checking Your Likes,” Susie Moore presents a compelling case for breaking free from the obsessive need for social media validation. The book explores the detrimental effects of constantly seeking likes and approval online, highlighting how it hinders personal growth and authentic happiness.

Moore offers practical strategies and techniques for cultivating self-confidence, setting meaningful goals, and pursuing a life aligned with one’s true values. Through a blend of personal anecdotes, scientific research, and actionable advice, readers learn to shift their focus from external validation to internal fulfillment.

The book emphasizes the importance of self-reflection, mindfulness, and cultivating genuine relationships offline. Moore’s writing is engaging, relatable, and infused with wisdom, making “Stop Checking Your Likes” a powerful tool for anyone seeking to reclaim their life from the clutches of social media addiction.

Review

“Stop Checking Your Likes” is a transformative book that challenges readers to reassess their relationship with social media and its impact on their lives. Susie Moore’s insightful and empowering approach strikes a chord with anyone who has ever felt consumed by the need for online validation.

The book’s greatest strength lies in its practicality, as Moore provides concrete strategies and exercises to help readers break free from the cycle of seeking likes and cultivate a more authentic sense of self-worth. The writing style is engaging and conversational, making complex concepts accessible and relatable.

Moore’s personal stories and vulnerability add depth and authenticity to the message, inspiring readers to embrace their own journeys of growth and self-discovery. While the book primarily focuses on social media, its lessons extend far beyond the digital realm, offering valuable insights into the human psyche and the pursuit of meaningful success.

“Stop Checking Your Likes” is a must-read for anyone looking to reclaim their life, redefine their priorities, and unlock their true potential. It is a powerful reminder that true happiness and fulfillment come from within, not from the fleeting validation of others online.

Introduction: Learn the art of self-approval

Stop Checking Your Likes (2020) is a practical guidebook focused on liberating individuals from the constraints of external approval. It offers actionable advice and mindset shifts to foster a life filled with confidence, joy, and ease, encouraging readers to pursue their desires without hesitation, regardless of their current struggles with self-doubt.

In today’s digital age, it’s all too common to find ourselves obsessively checking our phones, craving that next notification – a like, a comment, or a share – that signals approval and acceptance from others. This relentless pursuit of validation can become a significant source of anxiety, as our self-worth becomes increasingly tied to algorithmic whims.

But the quest for likes and comments speaks to a larger issue: our growing dependence on others’ approval. That’s the problem at the heart of Stop Checking Your Likes. Turning off notifications or taking a social media break is a good start. But the real goal is to fundamentally transform how you perceive and value yourself. Through a series of actionable steps, this Blink will show you how to cultivate a robust sense of self-worth that is independent of the opinions of others. So, put those notifications on mute, and let’s get started.

Other people’s criticisms only hurt as much as you let them.

Online we often encounter a myriad of advice that reflects more about those who give it than it does about universal truths. For example, advice on diet, like avoiding carbs after 2 PM, or on financial decisions, such as the importance of investing in stocks, really highlights the personal experiences and philosophies of the advisors. This variety of advice teaches us a crucial lesson: our views shape our reality.

This idea of subjectivity is crucial when dealing with criticism too. Often, criticism is just a mirror of the critic’s own biases and life experiences. It doesn’t have to affect us deeply unless we let it. Realizing this can drastically reduce anxiety linked to fear of judgment or disapproval.

To truly embrace self-approval, we must be willing to face and accept negative feelings without allowing them to define us. Confident individuals understand that discomfort, embarrassment, or ridicule are merely temporary. They aren’t scared to appear foolish or to be wrong, because at most, it leads to a passing bad feeling. Recognizing this builds resilience, which is especially important in a world where opinions and criticisms are constant and often magnified online.

The approach to dealing with criticism includes a powerful tactic: detachment. There’s real strength in choosing not to respond to negativity. It’s not about suppressing feelings, but instead about choosing our battles wisely to maintain peace of mind. This way of handling situations shows that our worth isn’t tied to others’ approval.

In practical terms, when dealing with hurtful comments or criticism, consider writing out your feelings as a way to emotionally vent – without escalating the situation. Whether it’s composing an email you never Intend to send or expressing frustration aloud in private, these actions let us process emotions and let them pass, just like clouds moving across the sky.

Also, adopting a stance of defenselessness in the face of criticism can be surprisingly powerful. Agreeing with a critic or responding with humor can disarm and redirect the interaction, making the criticism less burdensome. This tactic not only helps maintain our own inner peace but can also frustrate the critic, altering the dynamics of the exchange.

Through these insights, we discover that our well-being largely depends on how we react to what’s thrown our way. By embracing our inherent worth, understanding the subjective nature of advice and criticism, and managing our responses, we can handle life’s challenges with more ease and less anxiety.

Negative beliefs are often little more than wonky theories.

In today’s fast-paced world, it’s easy to fall into the trap of waiting for success to bring us happiness. But happiness isn’t a product of success; rather, success is more likely to follow from a happy state of mind. This concept encourages us to embrace happiness in the here and now, recognizing that life doesn’t start at some future milestone – it’s happening right now!

A key to living in the present and enjoying each moment is adopting a lighter view of life. Ancient wisdom from the Roman philosopher Seneca suggests that there are two ways to view the world: as a series of miseries or as a grand comedy. Choosing the latter allows us to bear life’s challenges with ease and laughter, reminding us that most of our problems aren’t as serious as they seem. This perspective doesn’t mean ignoring pain or hardship, but rather handling them with a lighter heart and a smile whenever possible.

It’s often our own thoughts that shape our experience of the world. Our beliefs are powerful, framing our realities and influencing our actions. Fortunately, the nature of a thought is that it can be questioned and changed. By examining and challenging our thoughts, especially those that are negative, we gain the ability to reshape our beliefs and, consequently, our lives.

When faced with negative thoughts, it’s helpful to ask: “Is this a fact or just a theory?” For example, concerns about not having enough money or about body size can often be traced back to unverified assumptions. Is the statement, “I don’t have enough money” a fact? Do you really not have enough money for food? Are you seriously at risk of becoming homeless? Probably not. Or take the statement, “My body is too big.” Is that a fact? Are you incapacitated? In pain? Can you make it through the door? Too big for what, precisely?

Questioning these thoughts provides immediate perspective and often reveals that many of our deepest fears and worries are based on flawed perceptions. This approach of questioning our thoughts isn’t about denial but about bringing clarity and lightness to our mental landscape. By regularly practicing this technique, we can break free from repetitive negative thought loops and start to see our situations more clearly and optimistically.

Applying these principles requires consistent effort. Each time a negative thought arises, challenge its validity. This simple but powerful practice can lead to profound changes in how we view ourselves and our lives, encouraging a more joyful and less burdened existence. Remember, life is unfolding now, and by embracing a more comedic and questioning attitude, we can meet our experiences with resilience and positivity.

Don’t ask what’s wrong – find out what’s missing.

Embarking on a journey toward personal fulfillment often involves confronting unexpected challenges and setbacks. Rather than dwelling on what’s wrong when faced with these obstacles, a shift in perspective to consider what might be missing can open a pathway to creativity and growth. This approach not only eases stress but also fosters a nurturing and inventive environment that is essential for self-discovery and happiness.

One effective tool for self-exploration is the “What’s missing for me?” exercise. This involves a personal audit where you list things you’ve never expressed a desire for, things you’ve felt sad about not receiving, or dreams you’ve never allowed yourself to pursue. The exercise encourages you to delve deep and continuously ask yourself, “What else?” This private reflection is aimed at uncovering latent desires and unmet needs.

After documenting these thoughts, take a moment to breathe and review your list. Look for recurring themes or patterns. These might manifest in various forms, such as a longing for more personal time, a need for greater adventure, or a desire to pursue new interests. Each list will reveal unique insights tailored to your personal circumstances and aspirations.

For example, a list filled with desires like traveling to exotic destinations, engaging in new hobbies, or starting new relationships indicates a yearning to break free from comfort zones and expand your horizons. On the other hand, a list that includes needs for quiet time, personal care, and reduced guilt over self-indulgence suggests a necessity to prioritize self-care and personal well-being.

No matter what your list reveals, the key is to start small. Choose just one thing from your list to address within the week. This could be as simple as scheduling time to relax or as ambitious as signing up for a new class. The importance lies in the action itself – taking a step to fulfill what’s missing, thereby enriching your life one small change at a time.

This process of self-reflection and incremental action encourages a healthy relationship with yourself, free from the burdens of external expectations. It’s about giving yourself permission to pursue what truly matters to you, ensuring you are well-equipped to offer the best of yourself to others. As the process unfolds, continue to revisit and expand your list, gradually building a life that feels more complete and satisfying.

If the prospect of trying something new feels daunting, take encouragement from the notion that it’s okay to be a beginner and to enjoy the process regardless of perfection. This mindset not only alleviates pressure but also opens up a world of possibilities where growth and happiness are within reach. Embrace the journey of discovering what’s truly essential for you, and watch as your world transforms, one small step at a time.

Everyone is worthy of asking and receiving.

Are you someone who finds it hard to ask for help or receive assistance from others? If so, it’s important to realize that giving and receiving are natural parts of life, and both are essential for personal growth and happiness. Embracing this dynamic exchange can significantly ease everyday anxiety and improve your overall well-being.

Let’s delve into the significance of receiving with the same openness with which we give. Often, people feel comfortable offering help but hesitate to ask for it in return. This reluctance can stem from feelings of unworthiness. However, everyone deserves support and assistance, no matter how small the need may seem. Whether it’s someone offering to stow your luggage on a plane or holding the elevator door for you, these acts of kindness are part of a supportive societal exchange.

Nature itself operates on a principle of mutual support. According to the philosophical insights from the self-help guru Deepak Chopra’s work on the laws of success, every interaction involves giving and receiving. These aren’t just actions but are fundamental aspects of the energy flow in the universe. Stopping this flow can disrupt natural harmony. Embracing both giving and receiving maintains an essential balance and keeps life moving smoothly.

It’s important to practice asking for help and not to view potential rejection as a personal failure. For instance, if someone cannot hold an elevator for you, it’s not a reflection of your worth but simply a momentary circumstance. Learning to ask for things, even small ones, like a favor from a neighbor or a preferred seat in a restaurant, can start a positive ripple effect in your life.

Another empowering approach is to simplify your perspective on life’s challenges. Ask yourself, “How can I let this be easier?” This mindset can be revolutionary. It applies to all aspects of life, from dealing with daily commutes to managing work challenges and personal relationships. By adopting a more effortless approach, you can reduce stress and make your life more enjoyable. A great way to put this idea into practice is to challenge yourself to actively seek assistance or favors. Start with requesting five things over the course of a week. This not only helps in recognizing your worthiness, but also enhances your self-esteem as you notice the positive outcomes of these actions.

Learning to balance giving and receiving enriches your life, helps manage anxiety, and fosters a healthier, more supportive interaction with the world around you. Remember, life doesn’t have to be hard; often, it’s about allowing things to flow more freely, which starts with acknowledging your own worth and the supportive nature of human connections.

You can reduce stress by focusing on the essentials.

Imagine if the daily pressures and anxieties you feel could be significantly reduced just by shifting your mindset. The idea isn’t far-fetched; it revolves around the power of your thoughts and how they shape your reality. Stress, often seen as an external force, is largely influenced by our internal dialogues. What if by simply changing the way you think about your responsibilities and challenges, you could transform them into opportunities?

A practical step in this transformation is changing your “to-do” list into a “get-to-do” list. This subtle linguistic shift can dramatically alter your perception of daily tasks. Are you merely setting an alarm for work, or are you grateful for a job that motivates you to start your day early? Can you appreciate a burnt dinner as a sign of shared moments with your spouse? Or feel thankful for the energy that lets you dance, even when you’re tired? This approach helps foster a mindset of gratitude, easing the weight of day-to-day responsibilities.

When faced with tasks or decisions, whether they’re as simple as preparing dinner or as complex as giving a presentation, asking yourself “What’s essential here?” can be incredibly clarifying. This question helps strip away the non-essentials, allowing you to focus on what truly matters. For instance, if public speaking is not your forte and the idea of presenting causes anxiety, simplify your approach. Use existing resources, focus on the key points, and allow room for interaction which doesn’t require meticulous preparation.

Similarly, managing social and health commitments can also be viewed through this lens of simplicity. Instead of succumbing to the pressure of a complete lifestyle overhaul, why not scale back slightly? Attend fewer social events, moderate your indulgences, and ensure you get enough rest and hydration. It’s about making manageable adjustments that align with your life’s current demands, not withdrawing completely or overextending yourself.

This approach to life doesn’t just alleviate stress; it opens you up to new possibilities. Imagine yourself wearing a cumbersome, inflatable sumo suit. When you’re weighed down by seriousness and stress, you’re metaphorically donning this suit, which blocks opportunities from reaching you. By adopting a lighter, more open attitude, you not only recognize the good in your life but also invite more of it in.

Ultimately, life is a series of moments, and if those moments are clouded by dread or anxiety, you miss out on truly living. It’s crucial to understand that adversities don’t impact us as profoundly as we anticipate. Our fears about potential outcomes are generally more daunting than the outcomes themselves. By reframing our thoughts and focusing on what’s truly essential, we not only lighten our mental load but also enhance our capacity to enjoy and thrive in our lives. Embrace this moment – your life is happening right now, and it’s the only one you’ve got. Let’s not waste it shadowed by unnecessary stress.

Conclusion

Advice and criticism often reflect the personal biases and experiences of the giver, not objective truths. Understanding this can reduce anxiety over judgment and improve mental resilience by emphasizing self-approval and detachment from negativity. Practical strategies like writing out feelings or humorously agreeing with critics can help manage emotional responses and maintain inner peace. Questioning the validity of negative thoughts can transform our perceptions, leading to a happier, less burdened existence.

About the author

Susie Moore is a life coach, personal development expert, and the author of best-selling books like What If It Does Work Out? She is a regular contributor to major publications like Forbes, Marie Claire, and Entrepreneur, as well as media platforms such as the Today show.